Statement from the Candidate

In 2010 I ran an unsuccessful campaign for the United States Congress, but I'm still posting blogs that I believe express an opinion that most other people miss, and that I also believe can make America great again and cast off the yoke of liberal/progressive control that is currently in place.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Hillary “Ain’t No-Ways Tarred”, She’s Just Old And Sick

Hillary is fond of quoting the old black philosopher who once wrote “I ain’t no-ways tired” (the word “tired” is pronounced “tarred” by our pandering Democrat/progressive presidential candidate), but she appears to be some-ways “tarred” because she is resting at home while the much-coveted, and very expensive, campaign jet stands idle at the airport.

One of the numerous reports we got from the secretive Hillary Clinton campaign was that she had become dehydrated (how damned hard is it to take a drink of water once in a while? Does someone need to be hired to be the nanny of the democrat presidential candidate and be sure she drinks her eight ounces of water a day?), so in her dishonest, pandering way maybe she should tell us that she ”ain’t no-ways thirsty”. And how hard and taxing is the campaign work of boarding a plane, riding in a car, talking for 15 minutes, and returning to the car and plane to go home? How does this level of non-exertion dehydrate a person? Only a deplorable candidate would find herself sick in bed from this low-energy level of physical exercise.

I know how tirelessly hard Hillary is working to provide for the future welfare of her American charges, people who, in her opinion, are too stupid to provide for themselves and their families, but how will she have the presence of mind to provide Americans with healthcare, water, food, a “safe space”, transportation, LGBTQ restrooms, an internet connection, schools, college, cell phones, housing and rid the world of the threat of ISIS if she can’t remember to take a drink of water for herself  now and then?

Oops. Now Hillary’s staff reports that she has pneumonia, and we can forget about the dehydration thing. Never mind, until the next lie is told.